Post by Aegle Vitus on Sept 11, 2016 21:27:30 GMT -6
Aegle watched Lily wordlessly as the faunus girl slowly made her exit. Where her raven haired guest might have been dreading an actively avoiding eye contact, her orange haired hostess made no such concessions. While she wasn't about to broadcast her reasons for asking Lily to leave, Aegle also wasn't going to shy away from the fact that she was, in fact, asking that the faunus girl leave. To do otherwise, to Aegle, would have felt too much like cowardice or defeat.
"No problem." Aegle answered automatically as Lily moved passed her, responding less out of conscious reassurance and more from an ingrained and habitual honesty of character. Her own voice, while not hoarse and measured, also carried an unsteady note that was fundamentally out of place in her usually amicable demeanor. It seemed especially evident to her, in that moment, that neither of them had wanted things to take the turn they had. Aegle, in that moment, actually considered backing down, but the thought had no sooner germinated before it was ruthlessly quashed. Simultaneously, Aegle's hand, the one not gripping the door knob, tightened into a fist, as all her anger and frustration momentarily bubbled to the surface. She was a girl of two fundamentally opposed desires in that instant. One part of her, the half that never took anything too seriously and just wanted to be everyone's friend, was in direct contest with the half that had scraped and clawed for every little bit of progress she'd made since her body had betrayed her. It made sense that it was this second part of Aegle which inevitably won out, because it was the part of her which would never even consider defeat, let alone admit it. So Aegle held onto her anger. She held onto the frustrated fury which Lily's words had managed to rekindle within her. That those words were not meant maliciously didn't matter. There was only the anger, and the resolve to never let anything make her feel weak. That was all that mattered.
So Aegle watched Lily leave, her jaw set and her smile gone, as the fundamental parts of who she was waged their internal war within her. She was about to close the door, and begin working out that internal conflict in a very external way, when Lily's voice drifted back to her from down the corridor.
"I owe you one, for earlier," she said, almost too softly to be heard. Then, just as she had before, Aegle answered with reflexive openness before her inner turmoil could tarnish her words.
"Don't worry 'bout it; Glad to help."
It was only after the words were out, after Aegle heard what she, herself, had said, that the orange haired girl felt her anger try to twist that moment of transparent honesty. She thought of harsh words she might send after Lily, barbed to make the faunus girl feel some small part of the hurt she'd unintentionally inflicted. Aegle briefly entertained the thought of chasing Lily out of the building with such words and, in a moment of weakness, she enjoyed the visceral satisfaction that might come from such an act. Then, before the fantasy was even fully realized, it was curdled by guilt, and a hot flash of embarrassment and self-loathing assailed Aegle, each thrice as strong for how seldom she felt them.
Breathing out slowly, Aegle slowly closed the door to her room, and once again shut out the world. She tried to shut out her brain along with it as she reached down the back of her hoodie and powered down her brace. She tried not to think, as she crossed the room with movements heavier and slower than before, about the things that Lily had said. She reached the punching bag and, without breaking stride, laid into it with a cleaving haymaker that had all her body weight behind it. It was a punch that, had it been delivered by a normal girl, would still have been strong enough to send the heavy bag swinging on its hook. Aegle's punch, meanwhile, barely seemed to register. Trembling, Aegle dropped into guard and sent another punch into the unmoving bag, then another, and another, and another, and another, and another...
"No problem." Aegle answered automatically as Lily moved passed her, responding less out of conscious reassurance and more from an ingrained and habitual honesty of character. Her own voice, while not hoarse and measured, also carried an unsteady note that was fundamentally out of place in her usually amicable demeanor. It seemed especially evident to her, in that moment, that neither of them had wanted things to take the turn they had. Aegle, in that moment, actually considered backing down, but the thought had no sooner germinated before it was ruthlessly quashed. Simultaneously, Aegle's hand, the one not gripping the door knob, tightened into a fist, as all her anger and frustration momentarily bubbled to the surface. She was a girl of two fundamentally opposed desires in that instant. One part of her, the half that never took anything too seriously and just wanted to be everyone's friend, was in direct contest with the half that had scraped and clawed for every little bit of progress she'd made since her body had betrayed her. It made sense that it was this second part of Aegle which inevitably won out, because it was the part of her which would never even consider defeat, let alone admit it. So Aegle held onto her anger. She held onto the frustrated fury which Lily's words had managed to rekindle within her. That those words were not meant maliciously didn't matter. There was only the anger, and the resolve to never let anything make her feel weak. That was all that mattered.
So Aegle watched Lily leave, her jaw set and her smile gone, as the fundamental parts of who she was waged their internal war within her. She was about to close the door, and begin working out that internal conflict in a very external way, when Lily's voice drifted back to her from down the corridor.
"I owe you one, for earlier," she said, almost too softly to be heard. Then, just as she had before, Aegle answered with reflexive openness before her inner turmoil could tarnish her words.
"Don't worry 'bout it; Glad to help."
It was only after the words were out, after Aegle heard what she, herself, had said, that the orange haired girl felt her anger try to twist that moment of transparent honesty. She thought of harsh words she might send after Lily, barbed to make the faunus girl feel some small part of the hurt she'd unintentionally inflicted. Aegle briefly entertained the thought of chasing Lily out of the building with such words and, in a moment of weakness, she enjoyed the visceral satisfaction that might come from such an act. Then, before the fantasy was even fully realized, it was curdled by guilt, and a hot flash of embarrassment and self-loathing assailed Aegle, each thrice as strong for how seldom she felt them.
Breathing out slowly, Aegle slowly closed the door to her room, and once again shut out the world. She tried to shut out her brain along with it as she reached down the back of her hoodie and powered down her brace. She tried not to think, as she crossed the room with movements heavier and slower than before, about the things that Lily had said. She reached the punching bag and, without breaking stride, laid into it with a cleaving haymaker that had all her body weight behind it. It was a punch that, had it been delivered by a normal girl, would still have been strong enough to send the heavy bag swinging on its hook. Aegle's punch, meanwhile, barely seemed to register. Trembling, Aegle dropped into guard and sent another punch into the unmoving bag, then another, and another, and another, and another, and another...